Her name was Cheryl, but we called her Cy. She is survived by a husband and two daughters, and loving siblings, especially a sister Charlie who never left her side.
Naturally this is yet another devastating loss. For those who knew Cy, I want to honor her a way I know she would be proud of. After today's heartbreaking news, many have wanted to walk away from all of this and pray it just goes away. I know I have.
I know I have.
But I know it won't and I know cancer will always be a part of my life and I really don't know how I would have gotten through this past year without all of you.
I am mad as hell right now. I hate this beast so much.
I have an appointment with my oncologist tomorrow.
Normally I get pissed because he is so busy that he doesn't take that much time to explain things. He is busy because aside from treating patients he is conducting all these clinical trials and finding better chemos to treat us with.
So tomorrow I am going to say to him, "Let's keep this short and you get back out there and FIND OUR CURE."
The BEST way we can honor our dear lost sisters is to make sure they didn't die in vain. They fought so hard and long. I personally want to shove every pink ribbon down the throat of every marketing manager who has hijacked our disease and turned it into some pretty pink fairy tale.
IT AIN'T PRETTY.
Starting right now, I will be more proactive in making sure the PEOPLE WHO NEED OUR MONEY GET IT. And those people are the researchers in labs across this country who have in a tiny test tube the key to unlock the door that gets us the hell out of this cancer prison.
That is how I am going after the beast and avenge the deaths of our beautiful sisters.
With each sister that we lose, my resolve grows deeper.
I will be goddammed if I am going to sit on the sidelines and keep watching my friends disappear.
For myself, I am going to push for scans, take the drugs, have the surgeries and do whatever my onc can throw at me to make sure the beast doesn't gain an inch. And if it does again, I will fight it again.
I will never forget a car I saw two years ago at a shopping center. It was driven by a man and it had two young kids in it. He was just packing them all in and obviously struggling with them. You could tell there was something amiss, that something was terribly wrong with the picture. When he drove away I saw it. He had a Breast Cancer Awareness license plate that simply said "ENOUGH"
ENOUGH IS RIGHT
I am going to cry my tears and mourn our losses and then I am getting back on the field and help the researchers fight for every breakthrough we can find. If it means pissing off the pink ribbon brigade... so be it.
Our Cy donated her body to scientific research to hopefully help find a cure or find a pathway that will help lead the way to better testing and treatment. Even in death, she is still fighting the fight.
For all our Warrior Angels I hope you will join me. When it gets to be too much to bear and you just want to hide away, remember we are fighting not only for ourselves and for our sisters who have gone before us, but we fight for those two little kids in that car and every daughter and granddaughter who will come after us.
Will you join me?